Chapter 5

It was finally saturday morning, and Willow was quite excited. Skipping out to feed Ghost had never felt so good. And the dance tonight would be even better.
"I know! I cant wait, I love your dress!" Kendala said running her fingers over the smooth black silk of Willow dress.
"Mine? Yours looks like a fairy!" Kendala's dress was long white silk, with a net type of material over the top, making it poof out. And she even had elbow gloves and a mask that went over her eyes.
"Were going to look so good, Aspen's gonna croak." They howled as they went outside to Ghost.
Willow had picked up a bridle in town the day before, and so she carried it out to the paddock that Ghost was happily grazing in.
Willow slipped on the orange halter and lead and pushed him to a trot around her.
His hooves were slowly thudding around her and despite herself, she almost ran beside him and hopped on. But at this moment, she wasn't sure he was ready.
Kendala grabbed a seat on the fence and watched contently.
After moving him to the round pen Willow rubbed all over Ghosts' head.
He heaved a smooth sigh and made chewing motions with his mouth, lowering his head.
After dropping the halter off of his head Willow warmed the cold iron bit in her hands before putting it up to his mouth-a trick that her father had taught her.
She slipped her thumb gently into his mouth and when he popped it open, slid the bit into the bit bed, the part of the mouth that has no teeth, and up over his ears.
His head shot up and he backed quickly, his hindquarters well under him and his eyes wide open.
Willow moved beside him, confident and solid.
Ghost snorted and tossed his head, but stayed in place, licking and chewing the bit uncontrolably.
Willow stroaked his coat and talked in a low voice.
"It's okay. Shhh..." She talked slow and sure, rubbing her fingers in slow, tight circles on his neck.
His head lowered and he finally let his ears fall sideways.
Willow walked forward, and Ghost fell in behind her, walking somewhat fast, but submissive.
"Question, Why did you stay beside him, you could have gotten squished, couldn't you?" Kendala had been silent until now.
"I wanted to show him I was never going to leave him, or hurt him, and I was always there, he can trust me now. Did you see how he followed me? He trusts me."
"So just by you putting a bridle on him, he knows all that?" Kendala giggled. "Thats pretty cool."
Willow turned around and slipped the bridle out of his mouth and replaced it with a halter.
Ghost nuzzled her waist and breathed out deeply.
"I love you boy..." Willow kissed him on the nose and swept a lock of hair out of her eyes.
She smoothed his matted mane down and leaned on his side, completely content with her life.


                                                                                        ***

After pinning the front of her hair loosly in the back, she let her curled jet black hair cascade over her shoulders, her eye make-up perfectly accenting her eyes. Her lips were coated with a sheer gloss which made her skin seem more pale.
Her dress made her look older and sophisticated, but not so old she look unaprochable. She had decided the moment she donned the black straight-jacket that it was not for anything but standing there, and looking pretty, and even sometimes she doubted that. She could barely breathe.
"I can't breathe!" Willow gasped in an all too fake voice, grabbing her stomach and crippling to the bed.
"They both giggled, despite their oh-so-unbreateable dresses.
A little more serious now they tugged and pulled at their dresses, slipped on shoes and perfected hair.
A curl on either side of Willows face blew over her cheeks in the breeze that crept through the window.
"6:04. Phew! I'm bushed, but I can't wait to see Brad in a tux." Willow giggled girlishly and fell back onto the bed, looking up at her glow in the dark star covered ceiling.
"So who is this guy that your going with now, Garret?" Kendala giggled, the blood obviously rushing to her cheeks.
"Yeah...I bumped into him at the supermarket. Well, more than bumped. We flat out knocked each other over. My canned tuna was all over him."  Kendala give a hint of a grin, remembering.
Willow had to laugh at the picture of beautiful Kendala, galavanting through the store, looking down at her list, and out of nowhere a handsome fellow-according to Kendala anyway-pops up and knocks the canned tuna right out of her hands.
A knock at the door startled them both out of their dream world with a jolt and onto the floor.
Willow clasped a hand over her mouth to keep a scream from excaping her.
"And why did that scare us?" They both giggled down the stairs.
Willow peeked through the peep hole, to see Brad straightening his appearence and russling the bouqet of red roses.
Willow squeled inwardly when she un-locked the bolt on the front door and smiled at Brad.
To Willow's supprise, he wasn't wearing a tuxedo at all, but looked more like the cowboy he was. He was even wearing a cowboy hat, just like he usually did.
"Hi Willow. Kendala." He tipped his hat and then offered the flowers.
"Oh how sweet." Willow excepted them and brought them to her nose, whiffing in the scent of fresh flowers.
When Willow returned from putting them in a freshly watered vase Brad asked,
"Ready to go?" He extended his arm, letting Willow hook her arm into his.
"Sure." Willow grinned as she turned around to Kendala.
"You coming?"
"Right behind you!" Kendala hopped into her car and sped away.
"No way! You brought a limo?!" Willow squealed as Brad opened her door and slid in behind her.
"Well, No actually, my brother, Nate, did."
"Your brother owns a limo?" Willow giggled running her fingers over the leather seats.
"Five limos actually. I pulled a couple stings and, Voila!" Brad grinned.
"Wow. This is so cool. I bet nobody else is gonna have a limo."


And Willow had been right. As they pulled into the drive to the school gym, there wasn't a limo in sight.
The first song was an up-beat song and Brad had offered her some punch, and they had sipped some until a slower song came over the speakers and the dazlingly bright lights slowed down.
"You wanna dance?" Brad grinned and offered his arm.
"Certainly." Willow hooked her arm into his as they stepped onto the dance floor.
She put one hand on his shoulder and he took the other, letting his hand slip around her waist.
Willow could tell he was stiff, and she ended up leading most of the song. He stepped on her bare toes atleast three times, and then apologized for not being a good dancer.
She could feel the blood rush to her cheeks when he had said,
"You look nice, Willow."
"You dont clean up so bad either." She suddenly felt wan. She shifted her weight onto the other foot and rubbed her hands together behind his neck.
Its so hot in here!
Just then the double doors drew open and Aspen appeared. Wearing the same exact dress as Willow.
She felt heat raging up her neck, and she had to bite back the harsh words she wanted to spew at Aspen.
A new boy, more-than-likely just somebody she picked up hours before the dance slipped off her bust length cardigan and let it hang on a hook.
"Not there! It'll get other peoples germs on it or something!" Aspen ordered. The boy was obviously bewildered, his mouth came open, hoping for something to escape, but then he shut it again.
Willows attention adverted from her date to Aspen.
"Go get me some punch, Dan." She ordered with a fake smile.
Aspen headed their way. No, she headed Brads way.
"Hi, Brad." She put on the biggest, most cheesiest smile and smoothed her sides, obviously drawing attention to them.
She just barely acknowledged Willow with a wanly-looking smile.
Willow did have to say, Aspen looked like she had gotten the dress two sizes too small. She was about to bust out of it, or maybe she had meant it to be like that. Either way, Willow could tell Brad was repulsed. And she was glad, because she was too.
"I'm gonna borrow your cowboy." Aspen grabbed Brad by the cuffs of his shirt, and Brad gave a look of pity to Willow.
"I'm sorry!" He half mouthed, half whispered.
Willow could hardly catch her breath.
By this time Kendala had reached her side.
"I," Willow managed to get out, "I think I need some fresh air." She made a beeline for the exit.
Her dress seemed to clamp onto her lungs, making it hard for breathing.
She gasped in supprisingly warm air and tugged at her dress straps.
She heard to door click shut behind her.
"Whats wrong?" Kendala's sempathetic voice reached her just as she slipped an arm around her shoulder.
"I don't know...Aspen showed up and ruined everything..." Tears pricked at the back of her eyes.
"Now..Brad didn't want to dance with her, couldn't you tell? He just didn't want to be rude."
"For once in his life, couldn't he not be a gentleman." Her throat clamped around her words.
"Its alright." Kendala pat her shoulder. "It's not going so great with Garret either." Willow watched her friends eyes moisten. "He keeps dancing with this other girl, Danika. Isn't that a yogurt?!" Kendala tried to laugh but it came out as more of a yelp.
Willow leaned her head agaist Kendala's for a brief second before hearing the door zip open and shut almost silently.
Kendala slipped into the door after giving a small squeeze to Willows shoulders.
"Willow..." Brad said in such a low voice it cracked into a whisper.
She turned and faced him, but didn't meet his eyes
"If you think for one second that I like that girl...Your wrong." A silence fell over them.
Willows eyes danced over her thoughts, and the green, bristly trees that skirted the little flower garden.
Brad continued. "She's desperate. She is very desperate." Brad chuckled lightly.
"And I told her just now that I just want to be friends with her. Because I don't like her like that." He said easily.
"Thats why she stormed off in such a hurry." Brad laid a hand on the inside of her elbow. It brought her to and she met his eyes.
"Ok." She managed to breathe out.
A comfortable silence fell over them as he wrapped her in a light hug before opening the door back up.
They had made chit-chat, talked serious and sometimes just danced.
It looked as if Kendala and Garret had made up. If there was even "making up" to do for.
Willow laughed. The four of them danced silly to a fun upbeat song that had ended the dance and Willows feet were plenty tired. And it was plenty late too.

The country air breezed through Willows hair, making it dance wildly. They pulled into the winding drive with lots of room to spair between them sticking out the top window, and the wooden overhang that stood over the driveway, sporting the hanging metal sign that said "Donovans Drive". Still hanging where her father had nailed it thirteen years ago.
She smiled at Brad. He had taken off his hat, for fear of it blowing off into the black night, and now his hair-what short hair he did have-was blowing too.
Their joy ride ended much too soon, as it always seemed to.
They stepped out into the late night air and Willow smoothed her jet black locks.
He walked her casually back to the front door of the old white farm house and chuckled easily.
"Whats so funny?" Willow giggled along with him.
"Look!" Brad gasped suddenly.
Willow whirled around in the direction he was pointing. She saw Ghost off in the inky blackness, almost florescent he was so white.
His halter hung loosely around his face, caught on a small supporting post.
He tried to lift his head when Willow came slowly over to his side.
She laid a soft hand on his shoulder as to not scare him, and began unfastening his stuck halter.
He pushed his nose into the grass and cropped easily, content now for his head to be free.
Willow gently pulled his head out of the lush green grass and stroaked his nose.
"How'd he get out?" Willow thought aloud.
"I don't know." Brad examined that latch before opening it to let Ghost back in.
"The gates in order." He offered with a puzzled look.
"I'll check the fences." She told him, "I'll be right back."
Willow disapeared into the house and returned a moment later with a flashlight.
They walked the length of the paddock fence, all thick wooden posts, in a comfotable silence.
Crickets chirped in the silence, and frogs croaked their eerie, lonely noise into the black night.
"Beautiful ain't it?" Willow said trying to crane her neck upward to look at the neonic stars, twinkling, looking as if one could reach up and pick them right out of the black sky.
Brad just smiled into Willow, making her feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
They kept walking, Willows flashlight beam sweeping the length of the fence.
"Looks alright to me." Willow said, mostly to herself, when they had finished the round.
"I best be getting home. Church tomorrow, will I see you there?" Brad shoved his hands into his pockets as he spoke.
"As always." Willow chirped out.
"Great." Brad beamed. "Hey, I had a really good time tonight. It was alot of fun." He tipped the front of his hat upward and scratched his head and replaced the hat.
"I had a wonderful time too." Willow felt the blood rush to her cheeks.
She hated the way her throat clamped shut, it made her feel vulnerable and uncomfortable.
She pressed the tips of her fingers together behind her back and swallowed nothing but air.
She smiled sweetly and clicked out the light, suddenly realizing how dark it really was.
It was completely silent, all the bugs and frogs had dropped out, and all Willow could hear was the panging of her heart inside her.
"Goodnight." She whispered through the soft darkness.


Willow plunked herself onto the couch and let out a content breath.
"Where've you been all night?" Willow started, her mothers voice coming from the armchair beside her.
She straightened up and pondered what to say.
"Because I'm sure the dance didn't last this long." Mrs. Armstrong clicked on a lamp and shifted towards her.
"We had to check Ghosts' fence. He had gotten out. What are you doing out here in the dark?"
Kristine stood and stretched in her pink flannel pajama's before answering.
"I was waiting for you to come home." Willow glanced at her watch, it was 12:23AM.
"Sorry we got in late. I'll see you tomorrow." Willow kissed her mom on the cheek and disapeared up the stairs before her mom had another chance to speak.
After wiping off most of the make-up, she set her alarm and changed into her pj's and colapsed into bed.
Her mind whirled and twirled and wondered all night, through dreams and restlessness.
Her alarm finally went off and she really had to stretch to hit the snooze button.
Her fingers had almost made it to the button, but it was then that she opened her eyes, and the world bent sideways, sending Willow onto the floor.
She sat up and peeled the burrito like sheets off of herself and tried to stand.
The world seemingly straightened back up and Willow got to her feet, shut off the alarm and straightened the overturned phone and lotions on the nightstand.
She finally caught sight of herself in the mirror and almost shrieked.
Her image was slightly impressing, if only she were a zombie.
She didn't just have bags under her eyes, she had the whole luggage rack.
After showering off and clothing herself in a jean skirt, belt, baby blue western button up and her scuffed up brown boots, she felt and looked better.
She pinned her wet hair into a loose bun and left her wispy bangs hanging out to dry on her forehead.
She fed and watered Ghost, happy that he hadn't gotten out again like the previous night.
But the image of him running free with his herdmates clouded her mind for a moment, and she had to wonder if keeping him was a good idea at all.
Maybe he could have found his herd again, but maybe not...Willow reasoned.
But his look of loneliness stuck with her, and she knew she had to spend more time with him.
I have to gentle him..I know I have to do it. I have to ride him, ride again...
Willow drifted inside and ate some breakfast herself.
The phone rang from its standpoint on the kitchen wall and Willow clambered over to unhitch it from the wall and say,
"Armstrong residence."
The voice on the other end cleared their throat. "Hello Kristine." An elderly voice said slowly.
"Oh, Ms. Lilly, This is Willow." She said politely.
"Oh my dear, I'm so sorry, these ears of mine are getting older." Ms. Lilly, their very good neighbor friend said, and Willow could just picture her throwing her free hand up in the air in exasperation at herself. Willow understood that the woman had been loosing her hearing for quite sometime now, but Willow had a special place in her heart for Ms.Lilly, because she had been the one to put her on a miniature pony for the first time when she was six.
Ms. Lilly finally spoke. "Will you be at church tomorrow?" The elderly woman broke off mid sentence and breathed in deeply. "Goodness! I meant to say this morning!" The elderly woman said in frustration at herself.
"Yes ma'am, we will." Willow said patiently.
After speaking a few more words, Willow imagined Ms.Lilly glancing at the clock.
"Look at the time, I must go now dear!" Ms. Lilly said lightly.
They both said goodbye and Willow replaced the phone to its bed.
Willow gobbled the rest of the cereal down and picked up the keys to her truck.
"I'm going now mom!" She shouted through the house.
"Alright sweetie! Drive safely!" Her mothers voice sounded from her bedroom.
The truck rattled to a start and Willow pulled it out of the driveway, to outskirts of town and pulled into the parking lot of her little brick and wood country church.
A bell was ringing for the 9:30AM sunday school children to run to their classes as Willow flung open the original heavy wooden double doors that had been there since the church had been built in the early 1900's.
Three young girls darted out infront of Willow, making her trip and fall.
One of the six year old girls, Jessica-Brads little sister-appologized and twirled a little red curl.
"It's just fine, no harm done." Willow said picking herself up from the floor.
"But where are my keys?" WIllow patted her pockets and searched the floor.
A little glint of light came from inside the coat closet. She opened the door and retrieved the silver keys from the carpeted floor.
"Sorry." The other little girls squeaked out and shuttered away.
Willow realized her wrists were raw from a carpet burn.
She winced when she tried to roll them.
She shoved the keys into her pockets and found a seat next to Brad, and Kendala found her way over to them.
Willow had seen her mother appear through the door way and find a seat next to Ms.Lilly.
The service started and Willow was already uncomfortable in the wooden pew's.
She fidgeted, and Brad leaned in and whispered, "You tired?" He beamed a cheerfull smile.
"Yeah." Willow screwed up her face. "Smartie pants. I only got a few hours of sleep. What about you?" She replied with a sassy tone, but ended with a sincere smile.
"I can run on only two hours of sleep apparently!" The piano chimed in that minute, making hard for them to hear.
"Now why on earth would you want to go with just two hours of sleep?" Willow questioned between verses of the hymns.
"I couldn't sleep." He said simply, with a thoughtful smile.
"Ah, I see." Willow smiled as the song leader annouced at the end of the hymn's, "You may be seated."
The preacher got up and preached a sermon from the book of Romans.
"Roman 6:23 says," Preacher Siman Rhoads, a man of around 30 called from the pulpit, "'For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.'" She had heard those words a million times before, and they always hit the same each time. She prayed she would never be seased to be amazed by those words.
After the sermon, the song leader got up again and called for song number 305, a hymn that was one of Willows favorites, I'll fly away.
"I'll fly away, oh glory, I'll fly away in the morning, When I die halelujah by and by, I'll, fly away..." Brad and Willow sang together as they shared a hymnal.
"Lemme see your wrists." Brad said after they had been dismissed.
"It's nothing, really." Willow reasoned with him as he held up her wrists and winced under his breath.
"What happened?" He asked, with no regards to what she had just said.
"I just slipped and fell earlier. I'm fine." Willow giggled.
"Now, I know that your clumsy and all, but you were just walking along and tripped, and ripped your wrists wide opened?" He squeezed her hands ever so gently.
Willow pulled her hands back and rubbed them together. "I just tripped, ok? It's not a big deal."
She noticed red heat climbing his neck.
"Are you ok?" She asked easily.
"I'm fine, ok? It's you I'm worried about." He said with more emotion.His eyes adverted from hers. She was trying to imagine what was getting him so worked up, and she could hardly think that it was just her wrists.
"Ok..." She said with uncertainty, hoping that it wasn't something she had done.


When the three friends had arrived back at Willows and were eating lunch, Willow annouced suddenly,
"I think I need to ride him."
"Who, Ghost?" Kendala said through a bite of sandwich.
"Yes." Willow replied, jutting her chin out.
"I think you should go for it." Brad said as he seated himself across from Willow.
"Good, then I have both of your approvals?" She took a sip of her own soda.
"Yeah, sure..But why?" Kendala laughed.
"Because, you two are my best friends, and if I was doing something to make you worry.." Willow broke off and smiled.
"Well you definitely have mine." Brad smiled and peeled the crust off his bread.